Tuesday, April 20, 2010

The Friendship Algorithm

Dr. Sheldon Cooper invented an algorithm to find friends. Although no such thing can actually exist, I kinda liked the name. Earlier, Sunil Gavaskar has written books like Idols & Sunny Days giving details of his compatriot cricketers and Farhan Akhtar has created a film, Dil Chahta Hai, on his friends. But I’m neither a writer nor a creative director. So, that leaves me writing this treatise chronicling my friends. Please feel free to write about me....

AMONI MONDAL:

Amoni aka Dhritiman Mondal is the one who has endured for the longest time with me. Coming July we will complete 19 years of friendship. I met him first in Std. I at Shirinbai Neterwala School, Maneck Nagar, Tumsar. He was a chubby kid with a stammer in his tongue. To be frank, this stammer only bought him closer to everyone. He had huge difficulty in talking but that never slowed him down. He had fitness issues and a slight bout of Asthma as well. But Amoni is a fighter and he has overcome all these odds. One more reason of his popularity was that he was the nephew of our teacher Sil Madam, who was slightly unpopular due to her strictness. But she is really cool, peaceful, loveable and a very good cook!
Although we had professional rivalry (Examination results), he and I continued be the best of the friends. One great thing about him is that he takes all the jibes along and never ever shows any displeasure. Let it be his stammer or his somewhat incorrigible stories, he has been the centre of jokes for long. But I have never seen him getting angry and getting overboard. In school, he was my very good friend and the only one who visited my house.
We don’t have the closest of the relationships and is not at all a Jai-Veeru friendship. We didn’t share some exclusive cherishable moments and were not party to some unforgettable events. There were others who were more close to me but alas they are not there now but Mondal stayed. One thing I must say, I’m very partial to him and generally overlook his sometimes overbearing attitude.
After 10th, I went to Bengal and he to Morshi, Amravati. We lost contact. But as soon as we returned back to Nagpur for graduation, the contact resumed. Most of my friends cut contacts as soon as they joined engineering but he didn’t. He would visit me at least twice a week and introduced me to some of the fiefdoms of engineering including the Telangkhedi Mandir. After his engineering, he went to Kolkata & I to Pune for my PG. His calls were infrequent but we stayed in touch. But he couldn’t stay longer there and came straight to Pune. Again the meetings and contacts resumed.
It would not be wrong to say that he is my sweetest friend and I would be hurt the most if he one day turns his back and never to say a Hi to me again!

KAUSTUBH AKANT:

I met Kaustubh first in Std. I but our friendship really kicked off in Std. V or VI. We were a group of 4, me, Harish, him and Chandan. We ate together during lunch and had long talkathons on topics spread over a variety of topics straight from studies to sex. In class 10th, he sat next to me and we had a lot of fun.
He is a good player and played almost all games with ease. He had the habit of leaving our cricket games to play basketball with senior girls. He was quite popular and that counts the girls as well. He is highly sociable, unlike me, and can make anyone at ease in matter of minutes and hence never had a dearth of friends.
During graduation, his home was a popular haunt for watching movies and matches. He is also responsible for my friendship with 3 of his good friends, Aditya, Kshitij & Aniket. We had loads of fun during those years. A joke amongst us was that Gandhi Buddha i.e. him will have to marry a girl of his parent’s choice because he would never be able to flirt a girl. But he defied all predictions and is the only one with a real girl friend and mind you a great one. The contact remained strong in Pune as well. His house is where I stayed until I got my hostel and yeah he was my local guardian during my entire post graduation.
He is a cool guy who has adapted himself to precincts of the society. He has this great quality of marching forwarding without looking behind at all. He is a guy who believes in future and always locks the past and throws the keys and never searches for them. Although it’s not what my doctor ordered, but seeing his success I sometimes think about trying the medication.
But of late, our relationship has not been the same as before. It’s nobody’s fault but communication has decreased and the relationship has not remained so warm as before. I hope it’s a transition phase and all will be well soon.


ARIJIT GHOSH:

I first met Arijit in Std XI in the hostels of Holy Home, Serampore, on the pretext of borrowing money to register myself for my Computer Science class. We were only on talking terms before the closely knit friendship actually kicked off. Computer Science classes, Cricket, Sanjay and story books brought us closer. We were both avid readers and my love for Sherlock Holmes & Sidney Sheldon is due to this very guy. He was quite affable and was a veteran in terms of being in a hostel. I learnt many things from him and my stay in Holy Home was enjoyable, pleasing and comfortable because of him being one of the factors. He was the gateway which led to my subsequent friendships with Sanjay and Baishishtha. We did play an important role in many of the mischief’s, the one with the fire extinguisher being the most dangerous, or our excursions to the fifth floor to look across the courtyard towards the girl’s hostel but we were always let scot free because of our good academic and behavioural record. We were especially close to Rajkamal Sir, who once during one visit had let us go saying that he took complete responsibility of us being untainted! (We in reality are verry goood fellows. Believe me!)
We lost contact after 12th. But God bless mobile communication which joined us again. He was the one who laid the cables. He had only one number of my uncle but he relentlessly went on to gather subsequent numbers to reach me. Once again he proved the gateway for my subsequent contacts with my Holy Home friends through mobile and Orkut.
This is one friendship which has survived the test of time and distance and progressed with constant speed.

SANJAY DEY:

He is another veteran hosteller and a very very dear friend of mine. He is completely different from all friends I ever had. He is not much educated or cultured as we so called high profiles would think us to be. But he has a heart of gold and he takes all decisions from the same golden heart. We were at different poles altogether and I actually had heard lot about him even before he came sometime in the middle of September. I was so afraid of him that I left my dormitory soon after his arrival .But thankfully I came back after the Puja vacations. Slowly I got to know how great and cool a man he was. He was impressed by my GK and I had to answer many times on his behalf when he had arguments. He liked me very much and was like a big brother to me. We were a team while watching the matches on our dorm television and my data was used to impress others. He gave special attention that I don’t fall to drinking or smoking and stay focused on my studies. I lost contact with him but Arijit and mobile brought back us together. He is a frequent caller and is rare when he fails to call once in a month.

ANIKET AGARKAR:

Aniket can be described only as crazy & weird if you don’t know him properly. Behind this façade is a sad guy who loves to have fun but something unseen withholds him. I came to know him because of Kaustubh during BSc I. Our first meeting was at Aniket’s house and we mutually disliked each other. But later because of being in the same college, our interactions increased and within a month we had cemented a strong friendship. He was little troubled and has troubling opening so easily to strangers. But surprisingly he liked me and shared many of his views with me. Whenever his grandmother used to go out of town, his home became the den to watch movies and have fun. The other criminal in this gang was Aditya. We used to laugh all night over trivial jokes and watch late night movies. In college we were part of a bigger group of mostly computer science students (I though was an Electronics student).
He was my intimate contact with the outside world in Pune. Every fortnight, we will meet and go to Deccan, park our vehicle at Apte Road, roam around Z-bridge & FC Road, eat dinner (mostly at Maharashtriyan, JM Road) and come back. We did it as a routine but this is what kept our friendship going strong and maintained sanity in our otherwise scheduled lives. Later, after my PG, his room in Pune became my sanctuary whenever I went there. He is quite unsocial and weird and in some ways are birds of the same branch. Even then I like him very much and become worried and sad if doesn’t call once in a week.

PRASAD JOSHI:
He is one of my closest 3 friends along with Aniket & Amoni. I met him first in my first year of BSc. What made me drawn to him was that he was from Tumsar. He was earlier reluctant to talk and generally used to stay with his relative, Kedar. But soon our friendship kicked and we became quite inseparable. Rarely would be a day when we will not meet at his uncle’s house where he stays. We were from the same batch and practical partners. Soon, I shifted my rooms to Abhyankar Nagar from Dhantoli which was near his home. Now we used to go colleges, tuitions together. Slowly and steadily our life fitted into a pattern. College, Tuition, talking and then home. Saturday we used to go to the Telangkhedi temple, check out gals at Futala and then have samosas at Shankar Nagar and come back. He is the one with whom I shared my joys & sorrow, beliefs & disbeliefs, friends & foes and many others. He was like the comforting cushion to me.
Even though a great guy he has the negative behavioural traits of having tinges of jealousy and more often tries to shroud him in excessive secrecy and mystery. This sometimes causes annoyance and irritation but that’s the part and parcel of the game.
After graduation, he helped me lot in my one year break to stay calm. During PG as well, we had great communication and the friendship strengthens everyday by leaps and bounds.

AVDHOOT DATAR:
I met this guy first in Hostel 3, University of Pune. He was my immediate neighbour and was kinda interesting. What brought us together was history & politics. We used to discuss all these sometimes well into the dead of the night. He is a great guy but extremely lethargic. This lethargy many a times caused tiffs between us but his dead-pan jokes always changed the scenario. It would not be wrong to say that his quest for Bengali made him a popular hunt for fun. I was his teacher and what I taught was only slangs in which I was ably supported by my other Bengali friends who had a better vocabulary than me. But he was innovative beyond measure and created slangs which instead of being abusive became hilarious. He generally took all this fun with the stride but sometimes I needed to play the pacifier.
The second phase of our friendship will be certainly the MSc-II year when we had our Astro classes together with Kaushalya. We had fun doing classes and practicals. At Ballava, whenever he came, the sordid dinner became Taj Mahal special. But here again his punctuality always troubled us. Even if we had to meet at 5, we will call him at 4:30. But then also he will come late by 15-20 minutes. We got angry and even scolded him but then he will win us over again. His lack of seriousness but over ambitious zeal for success and love for Mr. Thackrey got flak from us time to time but then Avdi is Avdi…
He was one of the most popular guys in the university across all subjects & strata. It is highly probable that he will find someone whom he knew perfectly well in busy Deccan as well as deserted Range Hills. His benevolence, easy-go attitude, coolness & stupid foolishness have won him many friends including me. I hope he remains the same albeit with little degree of seriousness added and yes remains my friend forever even if he gets a good wife!!!!

BARREL:
Barrel aka Soumyajyoti Haldar is one of my chubby buddies. We call him Barrel because he likes so. Most actually don’t know his real name. I met him first in MSc-I year. He is what we call a bit unsocial type and loves to stay away from controversies and gals. But that doesn’t stop him from being a team man. He has been a constant help during my studies. He is what many will say as “अखडू” and which cannot be discounted completely but one thing I’m sure about is that he has a heart of 24-carat gold, delicate but pure.
He hates big groups and especially if the fairer sex is a party as well. We have been to quite a few places together and the Ajanta-Ellora trip wouldn’t have been so fun without him. He is highly competitive, enthusiastic and I’ve always found him party to things which were challenging but within the permissible limits. Outside the limits, he is a man whom you can’t even budge a millimetre. His anger sits on the tip of his nose and many times his overbearing behaviour has brought in anger and opposition but at these times he behaved like an unruly kid. And I hate spanking kids. So, if we neglect these traits in character, don’t meddle with him much and let him be like he is, we can see the actual Barrel who lives behind this false façade. This guy has love, emotion and compassion but veiled by the false façade. Great to him as one of the individuals in my schemes of life.

ARADHANA NIKAM:
She is a girl and she is my friend. That is like finding water on the moon. Truly rare.
Aradhana Nikam is the best girl I’ve met in my short lifetime. She is the sweetest and most likeable gal I know. And this is not only my opinion. It’s an opinion shared by all who know her. She appears to be thin and fragile but that is completely untrue. She is fit both mentally and physically. She is an avid climber, has good grasp on Marathi literature and history, works for others through the NGO Jnan Prabodhini, benevolent, helpful and beautiful. Well her inner beauty surpasses any exterior beauty I know of.
I generally don’t like girls. But she is an exception. It would not be wrong to say that the influence she wielded on me is just next to my mother. She was my teacher cum guide not only for the city of Pune but also for life as a whole. Even though I knew her only since August-2007, the first time I talked to her properly was about a year later when she was to visit an art gallery on SB Road. I went to see that with her and that was the beginning. I don’t know how it happened but I surely asked her for help freely whenever I needed. She took the same place in my life that Prasad has. The friendship is still strong but little slack due to our quests for a great career.
Hope she remains the same as she is.


HIMADRI SONI:

I met Himadri in TIFR, Mumbai when I went there for a summer research programme. She used to sit at the adjoining computer in CM-30. For the first part of the programme, it was just a customary Hi & Hello. My computer although christened Hercules was the weakest in the room. Hence I had to use computers in DTP and in my lab for regular chatting. But slowly our interactions increased and we became good friends. The best fun we had was when we played that great Antakshari game during our trip to GMRT. Her friend, Aarti, our other CM-30 roommate, was feeling the heat of the project and had to work harder in the low temperature lab. We both were quite relaxed and along with Satti actually enjoyed our leisure time. Satti used to download movies for us and we used to watch them on my laptop. We had formed a small group of me, her, Sooraj, Janu, Arun & Satti (if not flirting) and generally tried to have our dinner together.
She is the rare combination of beauty with brains (She made me write this !!!!!! But if we neglect 'rare' it’s nevertheless true.)
After TIFR, an occasional scrap or a mail kept us in contact but not in that great way. But INAT-2008 cemented our friendship. And then the visit to Baroda strengthened it. She is a very dear friend of mine and I hope she will not forget me (Ha ha ha)!!!

HARISH KUNDARGI:

Another one of our quad from SNS. He was the only one who kept contact during 11th and 12th through ordinary mail. We had a rock solid friendship which continued over the mobile when we were in graduation. After that communication has minimized. We do have an occasional chat on gtalk.

SAURAVENDU BOSE:

Another of my good friends in Holy Home. He was from Deoghar and like me had a deficiency in Bengali. Works in Merchant Navy now. Always calls when he is on Indian shores.

KAUSTUBH NIMDEO:

He is different from any average teenager. Cool, reserved and not at all a masti-type. We share a friendship at the intellectual level and he is a great morale booster. Is in regular contact and my knowledge in money and economics of India gets big boost-ups due to him.

ADOSH DIXIT:
Another one of my good friends. Friendship blossomed due to avid interest in Geography, girls and general knowledge. Is in regular contact.

ADITYA DESHPANDE:

We share the same birthdate. Have never met a guy so much full of life and happiness. Of late communication has minimized. SMSinggggggg keeps us in touch.

ANUSTUV PAL:

My roommate in Pune for one and a half years. We tolerated each other to the utmost and had very few fights in such a long period. His another role apart from teaching computation was to supply movies. He is the one because of whom my knowledge in movies increased manifold and got addicted to Friends & Big Bang Theory. One friend whom I would not like to lose.

TARESH SHENDE:

Fellow Nagpurian. Friendship increased more because of Chiti & Barrel. Of late the only contact to physics in Nagpur. We meet regularly and have a steady friendship going on.

KAUSHALYA PATEL:

Astro partner. We had huge fun during the last year of MSc and especially during the late night practicals riding tripsy on Avdhoot’s M80 to Shivajinagar for a hot cup of coffee. Earlier I didn’t consider her at all. The only interaction I had in first year is when she wrote the invitation letter for the gathering. But as I started knowing her, I found my conceptions about her to be totally untrue. The only fault in my behaviour is that I don’t consider her much of a girl and talk in front of her uninhibitedly. She does complain about it. But I’ve not changed. She still remains one of the guys to me!

SUDHANVA LALIT:

Himadri’s Friend. This is how I came to know him. Friendship accelerated during INAT-2008 and my subsequent visit to Ahmedabad in May 2009.

DEAD ENDS:

BULBUL:
My earliest friend. She is just 2 days younger to me and we were acquainted even before we started studying. She studied with me till 10th. Was very good at heart.

DUSHYANT SORATHIA:
Friendship blossomed when in KGs. His father was a big officer where my father worked but our friendship stood rock steady till Std V, when his father was transferred. Have lost contact since.

MANISHA SINGH:
A true Leo. Had misunderstandings but were sorted out. Studied together until Std X. Have met a few times during graduation. She keeps a low profile nowadays and hence is unreachable.

CHANDAN GADVE:

One of my sweetest friends. We were a part of the quad I mentioned earlier. Have lost contact almost.

PRITI SURJAN:

One of the most intelligent girls I know. Stood first in our school in 10th boards. We had a good rapport during school days but now for the last 9 years we have absolutely zero communication.

ANAND AGRAWAL:
One of my best buddies in school. Had a great influence on me. We studied together during 10th. No communication since last 8 years. I even don’t know where he is.

BIKASH CHOUDHARY:
My first friend in Holy Home. But later communication minimized due to unknown reasons.

BAISHISHTHA MAZUMDAR:

One of my best buddies in Holy Home. We two were the only one without cigarettes, alcohol and girl friends. No contact since 12th.

SUJOY KARAN:
My first friend in Pune and the only one with whom I had a fight and a break-up.

4 comments:

Sudhanva said...

I guess you have nothing to write about me!!! seems as if u dont know me at all!!

Unknown said...

good attempt, but missed your touch somewhere, this time you were i think you were little politicaly correct

The Author said...

@Sudsid: U r still unknown to me buddy.
Let me know U a lil more. I'll write a six-page treatise on You but not on a public domain.

@Adosh: I know but political correctness is the need of the hour. I can't write rashly on a public domain.

Kaustubh Nimdeo said...

Hi, who is this Kaustubh Nimdeo you are talking about? As far as I know, im the only one with that name in Nagpur. have we met before? Or is there some1 else with the same name?